3 Reasons Why You May Be Stuck in a Job You Hate (and none of them are your fault) 

Are you settling for a crappy day job that makes you feel like you're living the same average day over and over again? I know the feeling because back in 2017 I too was stuck in a job that I hated. I've been where you are and I managed to get myself out of that situation, so I want to share tools that you can start to use to change your situation too.

But, you know what's really important to remember? It’s not your fault either. When you work in a toxic job you feel drained and like a zombie - it can feel like life is passing you by! It takes everything you've got just to show up there every day and try your best. You're so drained and you can't seem to find any spare energy to work out what to do about your situation or to try and change it, so you're just stuck - and you stay stuck.

Maybe you've thought about what else you could do, but that's just brought up loads more questions and you keep going over and over these questions in your head. It makes you overwhelmed anxious and confused. And you just can't seem to unravel the starting point of the whole situation so that you can take the first step towards the clarity that you need. So even though being stuck is awful and it makes us really unhappy, we stay stuck...

I want to help you get UN-stuck, so on this blog I'll be sharing inspiration, practical tips and my own story to help you plan your rescue so that you can stop settling and start living your most amazing life. In this post I’ll be exploring three reasons why you may be stuck in a job that you hate and what you can start doing to help your situation.

1. Your comfort zone keeps you stuck. 

So you've been in your job for so long that you've got uncomfortable there and it feels safe, even though it's really crap. You know the situation's making you unhappy, but even so, it's predictable and reliable. When you go to that job, you know pretty much what will happen that day and you know that you'll get paid. So maybe right now the feeling of safety still measures higher to you than the soul-sucking feeling the job gives you, and that's OK. There's nothing wrong with wanting to feel safe. 

You'll probably find that eventually something happens to push you to your breaking point, and then the crushing feeling your job gives you will measure way higher than the comfort that it brings. And this is when you'll have that push to take action and make a change. 

2. Lack of confidence 

You could be stuck because your job’s battered your confidence down to an all time low and you don't believe you're good enough to do something else. Years of dealing with a crappy boss or a toxic environment and being constantly overlooked for promotion and unvalued will do this to you. It'll leave you a shadow of your former self, wondering what you even like to do outside of work anymore, as you really can't remember and you might feel like you've lost yourself and feel like you've got no other choice but to continue on the path you're on because you don't know what else you could do. 

3. Your energy keeps you stuck. 

So you've let the situation with your job consume you and you use your energy not only dealing with the soul-destroying job, but complaining about it to your family, friends and co-workers. This mentally and emotionally drains you, because every time you talk about the awful thing that happened at work today, you relive it and your body feels the stress and anxiety of the situation. You will feel like it's happening again, so it uses up more and more of your energy and it prevents you from having the energy to make an escape plan.

I'm not saying don't talk about how you feel or what happened, but I'm saying make sure you choose someone who it's important to share your feelings with and talk to them. Don't spend your day talking about what happened to one colleague and then another colleague and then your sister.... and then your friend... and then your husband because you're letting it affect you. Just don't let things that happen at work take that much of your energy. 

So... what can you do if you're in this situation at the moment? 

Deep down inside, you know that you're better than this. You know you're worth more. You're meant for more. You know that you're settling at the moment, but your confidence is so shot and your self belief is gone - you're exhausted and you're scared. So even though you know this stuff, you don't know what else you could do instead. And you don't know where to start.

Reality Check - questions to ask yourself

So the first thing we need to do is a really gentle reality check. And none of this stuff that I share with you is meant to scare you or make you feel bad about yourself or make you feel down about your situation. We just need a really gentle reality check to check in with where you are so that you can start to unravel things and find that first step that you need to take to change your situation. So I've got some really easy questions for you to ask yourself to start this process. 

Question 1: What do I like about my job and what do I not like? 

Find a pen and a piece of paper and make 2 columns - "what I like" and "what I don't like". Write some stuff that springs to mind in each column and then ask yourself: are the things I don't like acceptable compromises? Why are they dealbreakers? So just spend some time thinking about each one of the things you don't like about your job.

Ask yourself - is this an acceptable compromise? Can I handle this or is this a deal breaker and just write down beside it which one it is?

And then ask yourself, are the things I don't like likely to change within the next year? So you could just put a yes or a no beside it. And then if yes, and they're willing to wait and see if they do change and if no, how long am I willing to keep wasting my time here? 

Because that's what it is, really. If you know you're not happy and the things you're written down are dealbreakers, and there's no chance that they're going to change within the next year, then you can't keep wasting your time there. You know you do need to make a plan to change your situation. 

2. Am I ready to make the decision that something has to change, even if it's scary? 

And then I want you to ask yourself, what's the first step I need to take to make this change? Is it finding my true passion? Is it building my confidence and self belief back up? Is it getting the hell out of here so that I can have some breathing space to figure out what to do next? 

These questions will help you start to unravel all of those overwhelming thoughts that keep going round and round in your head. The answers to these questions might just help you grasp that first step that you need to take. And if this feels scary, that's OK because change is scary. And thinking about this stuff can be scary!

But it's about finding your courage and using that to help you, and you do have courage. You use it all the time. You use your courage every day to push yourself to go to this crappy job. And face your boss or your colleagues or your customers. You use your courage for that. So now it's time to harness that courage and use it for yourself, for your future and for your dreams. 

Conclusion

I really hope that this episode helps you to see that your current situation is only temporary (that's actually a great affirmation too, “this situation is only temporary”). For me, every time I feel myself getting warmed up at work or stressed I repeat that affirmation.

Also, remember that it's not your fault that you've become stuck, but you do have the power to change your situation and the things that I've suggested in this blog are all great first steps. You can do this - use some of that courage to take those first steps.

Ready to take the next step?

If you’re ready to take those first steps then click the button below to download your FREE “Find Your Way Out” guide.

Inside you will find:

⭐️ The 5 surprising reasons why you’re still stuck in your toxic day job 

⭐️ Why none none of these are your fault (I’m sharing tricks employers use to keep us trapped!)

⭐️ My top 3 tips for taking your first steps to freedom.

Grab your guide here so that you can go deeper into this and plan your escape from your soul-sucking job!