It happens to us all doesn’t it? We think we’re ok and were plodding along everyday ticking off the things we need to do and making a little bit of progress…and then wham! Someone will say something that will trigger a deluge of doubts, worries and fears and we will go into a spiral of overthinking and doubting everything.
I have done it so many times. It would literally stop me in my tracks. Then because I’d stopped moving forwards I’d fall off the wagon and it would take me ages to get that momentum back.
Having this happen to me time and time again really knocked my confidence in myself and my decisions, both in my life and in my business.
I realised that I would ask advice from people who weren’t ‘qualified’ to give me advice on that topic – when I say not qualified I mean they didn’t know about that topic/area, yet I would seek advice as if they did. Then I would add their opinion into my already confused decision making progress which made everything more confusing!
I realised that I needed to pay attention and notice when a comment that someone made would start that overthinking and doubting cycle. The catch it and stop it! I’m so much better at doing this now. As a result I’m much more confident in my own decisions and in listening to what my instincts tell me.
I realised that for those times when the overthinking and doubting everything did get through I needed something to remind me that I’ve got this and that everything will be ok.
That’s when I decided to make a list of everything I’ve overcome and everything I’ve been able to achieve. I pinned this to my wall so that on days when I felt like ‘who am I to do this?’ and ‘nobody is ever going to buy x, y, z from me’ or ‘this is a stupid idea, what was I thinking?’, that I could go to my list, look at it and remind myself that I just need to keep going, I can’t give up and that I have got this!
How to remember you’ve got this!
- Ask for advice from people who know about the things you’re trying to make a decision about, not people who don’t have a clue or who don’t live in the same ‘world’ as you (I say people who don’t live in the same world as you because my ex colleagues would all love to have an opinion on things relating to my business, but they didn’t have businesses themselves and therefore weren’t best placed to give me advice)
2. Catch the spiral before it starts. Call it out. Keep doing this and it will start to happen less and less.
3. Make a list of things you’ve achieved or overcome to remind you that you’ve got this and not to give up! I’ve made a handy PDF that you can write these things on. It can be things like your education, a promotion, someone who told you they love your blog and you have to keep going, a promotion at work, that you’ve actually started a side-hustle while working full time (!!), you ran a marathon (or a 5k!!), anything you’re proud of yourself for. Write them all on the list and stick it somewhere you will see it everyday.
When those doubts, worries and fears strike and you start to ask yourself ‘who am I to do this?’ then read your list and remind yourself of the person you are! 🙂